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Thursday, March 1, 2012

Movement

I'm going to try to do this at least daily so that I can get in the habit of writing more consistently.
I'm experiencing movement today.  I started off extremely slowly and just reached a bit of a crescendo of sorts, and I'm going to ride the wave until I beach myself.

I've been confronted by disturbing things that are happening regarding my existence as a women, what my rights are, and a seemingly popular view that I don't matter.  That even today, with all the modern technology and things that we have available, we have yet  to evolve to try to respect each other.  That there are still people that actively want to to reduce my status to that of less that human, because I have genitalia on the inside.  Apparently this creates some sort of animosity in those with it on the outside.  Maybe because its hidden.  Maybe because its "mysterious" or just unknown.  But ultimately the outside wants to control the inside.  And that's horrifying.

In addition to this re-emergence of adversity, I'm more inspired than ever to actively resist this push.
I am not a feminist.  I am an equalist.  I want the same thing that everyone else wants.  Happiness, a place to have it, and people to have it with, safely.

I'm going to continue to empower myself by not allowing someone to tell me that I am anything but a useful human being.  That I matter because I exist.  That I may not matter to everyone, but that I would be missed if I weren't around.  I'm going to do this by making connections.  I'm going to grow.  I'm going to become more.  I'm going to speak up with I'm being pushed around (after I've listened and carefully chosen the words I would use) and not sit "idly by".  I'm not going to hysterically rant (thanks outside genitalia people for making that stereotype), I'm going to keep on trucking.  I'm going to watch.  I'm going to live.

I'm going to channel beautiful, amazing women in my life.  I'm going to find the attributes I love in them and see where they might live in me.  I'm going to give them a place to grow, I'm going to foster that growth and birth it out in the world through my actions.  That's what I call birth control, controlling where your energy goes and where you will let it blossom.

I'm going.  I'm on a path.  I'm embracing movement.

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